But mostly, this is all a metaphor for the way I feel now that I'm beginning to learn some of the history behind the education system, the politics of our government, and within society itself. I realize now how naiive I was, and I feel like my eyes are finally open to the reality of the world in which we live.
I see the system in effect all around me; every day in the most mundane actions of life--there it is before me, confronting me with the truth of it all. This knowledge has changed the way I perceive things. It has changed my opinions about so many things, that before I would have taken for granted. Now--I'm confused.... I wonder and speculate about everything; the motives driving people all around me, and especially those that are far away from me. Is there any truth to it all? Should I be worried about my safety or that of my family now that I know the secret? And I'm learning more--it fascinates me. I'm curious, I'm anxious, I want to change it, I want to avoid it; I want to scream with my frustration; I want to cry with the pain the knowledge brings me.
And what could I possibly do to cause some change to the system, which is, effectively, an elephant gone mad? Is it out of control? Do people actually control society from behind the scenes? It tickles my brain! This damnable need to know the truth of the matter!
And then Keith set me to searching the Freemasons and the Illuminati, which is another thread in this tangled web that was created to ensnare the population. The materials I've read through so far regarding the Freemasons merely supports what Gatto had described in his book The Underground History of American Education (which is also online free: The Underground History of American Education
So, despite the neglected appearance of my garden, I have been busy. Yet I remain confused, and I feel somewhat betrayed by my country, whom I have plenged my alleigance, and my heart; how could they take everything that was America, everything that made her great, and individual, and turn her into this theorized Utopia?! How could they do this to us?